Monday, October 22, 2012

Day #22 In a funk

Today is one of those days. I am in a funk.  I'm certain that lack of rest over the weekend contributes to this greatly.  Be that as it may, I'm still in a funk. I'm teary. I'm grumpy. I want to go back to bed.

I blew it this weekend.  Not externally.  You could have been in the same room with me all weekend and never known that I blew it. Because even though it was not evident on the outside, it was in my heart. Only two of us knew - God and me.

I was angry.  I still am.  I know what to do with my mad (take it to God, give it to Him and leave it).  I know how to do this. IT IS HARD TO DO.  I know why to do this.  His word tells me to, it's one of the ways He shows His love for me, by bearing my burdens.

I go through the thoughts in my mind, this is righteous indignation, I have a right to be angry about this. 

But really, do I? Didn't I give up my "rights" when I gave my life to Jesus? He calls me to complete surrender.

This battle between flesh and Spirit continues. It is day by day, sometimes hour by hour, even minute by minute.

I've asked God to forgive me for my anger, and I know that He has.  Now, it is time to move forward and leave this in the rear view mirror.

Sweet surrender.  That seems like an oxymoron.  But what rest it brings. Rest for my heart.  Peace that I cannot find anywhere else.

Lamentations 3:22-23

22 Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed,
for his compassions never fail. 
23 They are new every morning;
great is your faithfulness.



  1. Dear Niki,
    Thanks for your honesty. I've been in a funk for several days. I'M so tired of getting old and getting the aches and pains that go with getting old. I simply never planned on getting old, but it seems to happen no matter what we plan.
    I love the verses you posted. I know God loves me and I am choosing to rejoice in that knowledge.

  2. Marilyn, I'm so glad you could be encouraged today when reading this. Love you!