Girls get-away for #13

When our girls were little, I heard about another mom who would take their girls away overnight for their13th birthday. I knew I wanted to do that, too. Jay gets to take them somewhere fun for #16 (he and Katie went to New Orleans for hers). 

So, this was it. The weekend I got to take Mary Margaret overnight for her 13th. We went to Bentonville, Arkansas. 

Fantastic lunch at The Crumpet. The orange rolls were delicious. 

Drop in art was fun at Crystal Bridges Museum. 

We couldn't resist the selfie in front of one of our favorite words. 

We saw deer, up close and undisturbed. 

We even caught a glimpse of Spidey and his co-hort. 

We had a blast! Good fun, nice hotel, lots of bargains and great conversation. I love being this girl's mom. 

I'm too young

I'm too young to have been married twenty years. And if you are my FB friend, you've seen the pictures this week  from our wedding twenty years ago. This is my last mention of it, really it is. But I believe this is worth celebrating! 

I rarely blog or post on FB about my relationship with Jay. There's the occasional mention here or there but I don't too often. For a few reasons, but the main one is that I know that everyone's husband is not like mine. I don't want to be perceived as bragging about him. 

We had guests, another couple, in our home after we had been married just a few months. After supper, the guys left. The other wife asked me how Jay treated me when no one else was there. Not sure of exactly what she was asking, I replied that it was the same as when anyone else was there. She was amazed that he refilled my tea, cleared my place, and spoke kindly to me. She said those specific things to me. She noticed that he did those things and thought it was because he had an audience. I wish I could describe the look on her face when I insisted that's how he is all the time. Disbelief. She just shook her head, said, "You have no idea how good you've got it." and was very quiet the rest of the evening. A few years later, they divorced. She had lived with verbal and emotional abuse for years. 

Jay is an amazing man. He consistently puts my needs and my wants before his own. He serves me daily. He does not complain about what I do or about what I don't do. He does the dishes. He irons better than I do. He is patient with me. From day one in our relationship, he has said that he knows there is a part of me that can only be filled by time with friends. He has always encouraged me to take time for myself, spend time with friends, or Mom and Kelli, and he sees that I come home a better mom and wife. My spirit is refreshed. (this was a much bigger deal when Katie and Mary Margaret were little. It's much easier to do this now.) 

He dances with me in the kitchen. 

Side note - here's the playlist Mary Margaret put together for our anniversary date this week. It was a hoot! He had moved the rug, table and chairs out of the kitchen so we had a great dance floor. 

He has asked the question, "Do you want me to listen or do you want me to fix it?"

He has shown me grace. Like the time I backed into the garage door. Or when I bounced the check the first time he registered to take the CPA exam (he's been balancing our checkbook ever since!). The list goes on and on.  He has freely extended forgiveness to me. He has been patient with me when I've struggled with depression and anxiety. He has taken care of me when I've been sick - menengitis, food poisoning and recovering from surgery. He has taught me that the gift we give when we accept others as they are, rather than trying to make them what we think they need to be, is priceless.

He apologizes when he messes up. He says, "I was wrong."

He has never raised his voice at me. And he insists that Katie and Mary Margaret treat me with respect. 

He makes me laugh. A lot. A whole lot. 

Is he perfect? No. But he is perfect for me. 

When I was pregnant with Katie, I bought a children's book. 

He would lay beside Katie on the floor (when she was a few months old) and read this book to her. "My dad is as strong as a gorilla! My dad can sing like a rock star! My dad is awesome!" 

For Father's Day this year, Katie and Mary Margaret wrote their own version of the book. 

They filled it with photographs of them with their dad. This page made me smile. 

And this one made me laugh. 

And this one took my breath away. 

Book club, June 22, chapters 13-16

I hope you are enjoying reading along with me. Feel free to post your answers in the comments. 

10. Has God ever called you to take a step of faith with your finances or career? What was it? How did you handle it? Did you see him provide in ways you couldn’t have imagined? The biggest step of faith in this area was when we made the move to Missouri in 2003. Jay had worked so hard and had bought into the partnership of the CPA firm where he was working. This represented financial security for the coming years. To take a significant pay cut and go to work for the Missouri Baptist Convention as controller -- well, some thought we had lost our minds. But when you clearly know God is leading, you just do it. God did bless and provide, over and over, financially and also through our friends, who became like family. 

11. What was the worst home improvement challenge you’ve ever taken on? Was it worth it in the long run? Oh, boy, well, after gutting one house and nearly gutting another, I can't even narrow it down to one project. Absolutely worth the wait every single time. Here is one of my favorites (before and after) from our house on Brookside Blvd. in Jefferson City. 

12. Do you agree that it’s sometimes our job to be our spouse’s cheerleader? When was a time that you encouraged your husband or helped them through something they were going through?

Yes. I believe that I am Jay's biggest cheerleader. Our pre-marital counselor told me that if Jay has had the absolute worst day, and the world has beat him up all day long, if he knows he has a safe place (me) to come home to, he can find the strength he needs to go back out and do it all over again tomorrow. The most recent time I've been this for Jay was when we moved to Springfield. A new job is a daunting task. It was of utmost importance for him to know I'm behind him and beside him 100%. 

I will say that he is the same for me. When I'm fearful about trying something new or something I think I'm not good at, he says, in his quiet but sure manner, "Niki. You've got this!" 

Book club, June 15, chapters 9-12

Several people have asked me questions about this book. If you are reading along, I hope you will take a few minutes and answer the questions. Thanks! 

I love the story in chapter 9 about P's response to Melanie's belly button surgery. And the acupuncture.  "Oh, hindsight. You are funny."

Her chapter titles crack me up. "That Time I Almost Went on Judge Judy."

The hardest I laughed in the whole book was in chapter 12 when P did the reading at their friends' wedding. Great point to the story though - I am my husband's cheerleader. 

1. Do you remember things you found out about your spouse after you got married that you didn’t necessarily know beforehand? I remember realizing that we  had both participated in things before marriage, simply because it was a way to spend time together. Ex. I don't play tennis. But I would go just to be with Jay. It certainly didn't take him long to figure that one out. He would go shopping with me. That is really not one of his favorite things to do. He also balances the checkbook to the penny. My thought at that time was, "I'm sure they know what they're doing over at the bank. Why should I waste my time opening those envelopes they send me?"

2. What was the first fight of your newlywed days? I'm pretty sure it was when we got a letter in the mail saying that the check mailed in to pay for jay's CPA exam had bounced. And yes, I was in charge of the finances at that time. Guess what? He started taking care of them right then and has been doing it ever since. It works well for both of us that way! 

3. In Chapter 7, Melanie discusses finances. Do you have a budget you stick to every month? Yes, we do. We have used the envelope system for cash for 12+ years. It works well for us. Each year we look at our budget and adjust according to things we know are ahead of us that year. I'm thankful for a husband who believes in saving and is disciplined in that. 

Book club, June 8, chapters 5-8

I've had several people mention this book to me in the last week. If you are reading along with us, please post your answers to the questions. It's so interesting to read each other's answers. 

Favorite parts from chapters 5-8.

I love the reference to Shipley's donuts in chapter 5. The taste of my childhood. My older brother took me to school in 6th & 7th grades - Tommy is 7 years older than I am, and would drop me off on his way to class at LSUA. Anyway, every once in awhile he would swing by Shipley's and get us donuts on the way. As a 12 year old, being driven to school by my older brother, who drove a royal blue beetle bug AND blared Huey Lewis and the News and the Dazz Band from the stereo AND throw in Shipley's --- could it get much better? I certainly didn't think so at the time. 

Moving on...

"Then there's old love. Old love is the comfortable shoe of relationships. You know each other. Each of you as a little more worn and not as pretty and new as used to be." Isn't that the truth?

The Possums. Enough said. 

Chapter 7 "We Make Dave Ramsey Sad."  I laughed out loud when I read this chapter title. 

I loved reading about when Melanie decided to paint the back house. "'You still have a lot of work to do!' Thanks for pointing out the obvious. You must be related to my husband. Have a nice day.'

"In a lot of ways home improvement is like marriage. It's not glamorous. It can take a lot of hard work and effort. Their days it feels like it might be easier to burn the whole thing to the ground and start all over again. Then you remember how much you love the house or your husband and you recommit yourself to what it takes to see the whole thing through.... You have the satisfaction of knowing you've made something beautiful."

1.  Have you ever made a list of qualities you want in your future spouse? What things did you include that ended up not being as important as you originally thought? I did make a list of qualities I hoped for in a future spouse. I was hoping for a man who was taller than me, weighed more than I did, was a people person and a great listener, had a great sense of humor and loved Jesus more than he loved me. Girls, I got everything on my list. And so much more. 

2. What are some things in your life that you feel like you’re waiting on right now? Do you agree that we’re all waiting on something, no matter where we are in life? When I first read this, I thought, "I am not waiting on anything right now." And then I noticed a topic they keeps coming back to my mind - where will Katie go to college? Nearby? Far away? And even though it's not waiting on specifically something for me, it will be a significant change in my life. And after just being away from her for nearly two weeks, I confess, I am not looking forward to it. And yes, I agree, that we are all waiting on something, regardless of the phase of life. 

3. In Chapter 4, Melanie mentions a list of celebrities she’d be friends with if they ever met. Do you have a list? I think I could be friends with Elizabeth Hasselback, Patricia Heaton, Julia Stiles, Jennifer Garner and Nate Berkus. 

Book club June 1, chapters 1-4

Ok, friends, here we go!

Disclaimer - I'm not exactly sure what I'm doing here, but I think it will be fun and interesting, so here goes. 

 I'm going to mention my favorite parts of the first four chapters and then post suggested questions from Melanie. 

Page 6, (referring to the registration process when you pick out all the things you think you need before you get married) "...you're selecting things for the life you think you are going to live, when in reality there is no way to know what life will really entail." Amen to that, Sister! 

Page 26, "My other talent is committing to things that seem like a great idea at the time and regretting it later." Oh, yes, I have learned a few lessons with this one. 

Pages 32-33, when she writes about Perry coming back to the car with a plastic grocery sack, and the next day "he made the walk of shame in his wrinkled rented tuxedo." I laugh every single time I read this. 

1. In Chapter 1, Melanie mentions that she’d always envisioned a Christmas wedding but ended up getting married in August. How did your own wedding day differ from what you thought it might be?  To tell you the truth, I don't remember spending a lot of time imagining my wedding. I do know that I wanted it to be different than everyone else's. I saw pictures of a wedding with cream colored bridesmaids dresses and I knew I wanted mine like that, too. That was not something I had seen before where we lived and people (including my mother) thought that was a crazy idea. I also wanted our wedding to be personal but didn't really know what that would look like. Our pre-marital counselor suggested we each write a letter to our parents and have them read as part of our ceremony. We took his advice and it added a beautiful element to our wedding day. 

2. Have you seen ways in your own life that marriage tends to amplify whatever insecurities you have? Have you looked for your husband or job or anything to complete you in some way? I learned the hard way that Jay is not meant to completely fulfill me. Jesus Christ alone can do that. I had expectations of Jay making me happy all the time. I set myself up for disappointment and I set him up for defeat. Thankfully, through great counsel, we weathered that storm and came out on the other side stronger than before. 

3. Do you remember the first time you met your spouse? What stands out in your mind? The first time I saw Jay, he was playing volleyball with my brother, Tommy. Jay had on purple shorts. I remember that he had braces on his teeth, he was a great volleyball player and he had great legs. Basically I thought, "He. Is. Hot." But out of my league. 

Post your answers in the comments. It will be interesting to see all our different answers. 

Summer reading

Join me on June 1st for an online book club. We will be reading The Antelope in the Living Room by Melanie Shankle aka Bigmama. 

I have been reading Melanie's blog for almost ten years. http://thebigmamablog.com She was recently a guest on Focus on the Family. 

I hope you will join me this summer. Each week we will read a few chapters and every Monday I will post "discussion questions". We can "discuss" through posting comments. You can pick up your copy at LifeWay or Target (I'm sure it's other places, I've just seen at both of these) as well as Amazon. It is also available as E-reader format. 

This is from the back of the book. 

(See you back here June 1st!) 

Marriage . . . you gotta laugh.

They say that marriage is a lot like insanity, in that they both require commitment. I so get that.

When you’re in those first giddy stages of dating, you have no idea what life is going to throw your way. You’re just two bright-eyed kids full of optimism, convinced you’re going to be the happiest married couple ever.

Y’all. Trust me. Saying, “I do” is easy. It’s the next fifty years or so that can get a little tricky.

There are days you feel like you’ve never loved each other more. But there are also days filled with disappointment and silence that never seem to end because you just can’t seem to find the words to make it right.

Marriage can be the biggest blessing and the most significant challenge two people ever take on. It’s the joy of knowing there’s someone to share in your sorrows and triumphs, and the challenge of living with someone who thinks it’s a good idea to hang a giant antelope head on your living room wall.

And yet we are in this thing together. For the rest of our lives. Not just for better or for worse, but for better AND for worse.

That’s what this book is about. The times that brought us together and the times we were falling apart. The days we wouldn’t trade for anything in the world, and that time he hung an antelope on my wall.

Welcome to the story of a real marriage.

Melanie (aka Big Mama)

Another reminder of how He loves

Yesterday, as we (Katie, Mary Margaret & Sophia Vaughn) were heading to church, I had Katie snap this picture of our street. 

We slowly made our way out of the neighborhood and onto Battlefield Rd. As we started down the big hill on Battlefield, just before Lone Pine, the car in front of us lost control & slid into the middle of the road, going sideways. In trying to brake, my car started sliding as well & we missed the other car literally by inches. As we got right up to it, and I thought we were going to hit it, I saw the faces of the two ladies in the car, and it was two of our senior ladies from Second. The terror on their faces was indescribable. I was able to steer my car into the turning lane & go around them. As I regained control & kept going, the girls & I watched in the rear view mirror as cars were coming over the hill. Somehow, the lady was able to back up, turn her car around & keep going in the right direction & the cars coming down the hill toward her were all able to stop. 

We get to church, I see Jay, and I just lost it. Then, as soon as we started to sing, I had a "flashback." As we were backing out of the driveway, I prayed out loud, asking the Lord to put His angels of protection around us & get us safely to church. At that moment, I was so overwhelmed at the clear realization (once again), how personal my Savior is. He is the King of all kings, yet still cares about me, my daughters, Sophia, our safety. This is not new information for me, just a fresh reminder of how He loves. I was so overwhelmed I could not stop my tears. 

I am reading Pursuing the Christ - Prayers for Christmastime written by Jennifer Kennedy Dean. My friend Mary Kate gave it to me. I'm a big fan of JKD but had not seen this book before. There's a reading for each morning & evening, for each day of December. This is part of last night's --

"Knowing that you have given to me Your finest treasure, I can rest assured that You will not withhold anything good from me. You shower me moment by moment with tokens of Your love. I pray that my eyes stay open to see the good and perfect gifts that are always flowing from You to me."

Here we go again...

 

In 2009, I started this blog to write about the transformation of the house we bought on Brookside Blvd. in Jefferson City. This is my favorite post of befores and afters in that house.

 

Well, here we go again! One week from today, we take possession of our next house. 

Little by little, we will make it our own, and it will gradually go from "the house" to "our home." I will post updates as we make progress.  Here are a few of the before pics.

 I cannot wait to paint this front door! I'm going with a red.

Nice big kitchen!

Dining room.

First, flooring will come up, all trim & doors & cabinets will be painted. Walls will be next. New flooring goes down.  Cleaning cleaning cleaning all the while.

Let the fun begin!



Happy Father's Day, Dadddy!

 

My dad loves to tell the story about how when I was a baby and my family was traveling, they would put me in a cardboard box in the floorboard of the car. For real. There’s even a picture (somewhere at Mom’s) to prove it.

When Mary Margaret was born, he got a lot of mileage out of telling people she was named after the mother of Jesus and the mother of Tom.

My dad loves to tell lots of stories, and ask lots of questions. And I am exactly the same way!

 

In light of Father’s Day being tomorrow, I was thinking about what I’ve learned from my dad. Here are the ones that came to mind immediately.

1.       Find the bargain. You’ll be glad you did.

2.       People are important. Things are not.

3.       The principles we live by are based on what God’s Word says, regardless if we serve in ministry or not. As a teen, I said to my mom, “I sure wish Daddy wasn’t a preacher, then he would let me blah blah blah (I don’t even remember what it was).” She went on to tell me that it was not because he was a preacher that he felt the way he did; it was because he was a believer, and his stand was because of what the Word said.

4.       Pick your battles.  When I asked him one time (I was a new parent) how he & Mom knew which issues to make a big deal about, rather than making a big deal about everything. He said that they picked their battles. I can look back and see the wisdom in how they did that with me.

5.       In marriage, it’s the everyday things that make or break a couple. The trips away are a good thing, but it’s the day in and day out, the way we serve (or don’t), engage with (or don’t), honor (or don’t) each other every single day that will keep us connected (or not).

6.       Serve. Don’t just talk about serving, do it. I may have blogged about this before, but about 10 years ago, I ran into a man who Daddy pastored and also officiated his wedding in the late 70’s. This man wanted to go into ministry, and went on to seminary after college. He told me that his wife’s dad had died and the family didn’t have a pastor, so Daddy went & did the funeral. He said that the family was poor and could not afford to pay the company that would come and dig the grave, so after the graveside service was over, the uncles and other family members there took the shovels and started digging. He said it was raining and just a dismal situation. He said Daddy took off his sport coat and laid it on a chair with his Bible, grabbed a shovel and started digging.  The man said, “Your dad taught me more about ministry that day than any class I’ve ever taken.”

 

I am thankful that my two daughters have a dad that has the same values that my dad has. What a heritage.  I know that everyone does not have the same provision.

I am so thankful.

Word for the year...

Years ago, Dr. Uth (at First Baptist West Monroe) would challenge us to find a word for the year.  I still think of that every January. 

In years past, my words have been surrender, contentment, opportinities.  You get the idea.

This year it is discipline. I'm hesitant to even choose this word because it sounds so new-years-resolution-ish.  But truthfully, it's something I've been lacking/struggling with lacking for months - both spiritually and physically.  Some things have got to change in my life.  I'm so frustrated with myself - my laziness.  Starting the year with the Daniel Fast is one way to practice. 

What about you? What's your word for 2013?

What a week!

Highlights:

Mary Margaret was already on her break from school.  She and I got $5 manicures at the beauty school.  Sometimes, you get what you pay for. But it was fun!

Mary Margaret had 3 girls over to make gingerbread houses.  Hearing their laughter was a delight. 

Katie finished her finals and is now on break.  And is now enjoying watching movies, reading books, sleeping in and NO geometry.

Coffee with a friend while it snowed outside.

Big smile on Mary Margaret’s face when she saw the snow coming down.

Dessert date with my hubs (had dinner with the girls here at home, then went out for dessert – great for a quick, inexpensive date and uninterrupted conversation.  I sure do love spending time with this man). 

Dinner twice this week with Ms. Ruth and Dr. Marshall.  How amazing it is that around 2003ish, Jay made the statement that it would be an incredible opportunity to be mentored by/work with Dr. John Marshall, and here we are at Second Baptist in 2012.  God does give us the desires of our hearts. 

Met some new friends, inspiring conversation.

Katie got her driver’s permit.  Is she really old enough to be driving? Time is flying by. I want to push pause for awhile.

Lots of laughs with the other pastors and wives (with the exception of the Segars, who we missed!).  White elephant gifts that I am certain will be regifted.

Charades in our living room, watching Jay act out “I Want a Hippopotamus for Christmas.” It was absolutely hilarious. 

Watching Tim Hawkins and Dave Barnes Christmas videos.  Laughing some more.

One friend’s daughter is feeling better, one friend’s mom is now home recuperating from surgery, another friend stood her ground with courage, another friend’s daughter moved back home with an attitude of appreciation, another friend’s husband has a promising new job just around the corner.

One friend spoke bluntly to me and nailed me, my selfishness is ever before me.   I needed to hear her say it.  How thankful I am for friends who speak truth and love me even when the not-so-lovely pieces of me are seen so clearly. God uses people in my life to speak to me, to direct me back to Him.

In light of the evil that was so clearly evident last Friday, it does my heart good to see God at work around me, and be reminded that He is active.

Simple pleasures. Can it get any better? I don’t think so.

Day #30

 

She turns 15 today. I remember clearly the day she was born.  I was so glad she was not born on Halloween.  She missed it by an hour and 15 minutes.

Katie, I am telling you, girl, I love being your mom.  You make me smile. You make me laugh.  You handle yourself with grace. You engage with people around you.  You are so much like your dad!

I want to be like you when I grow up! (smile)

Seriously, you are an amazing young woman.  I see Jesus all over you.  I am so thankful that you love Him so much.  Because, as many times as people around you (including me) will let you down, He is The One who will not.  It's going to be so exciting to see you join Him as He is at work around you. 

I hope it's a great birthday for you.  And you can thank me later for not showing up today at school with balloons.  Love you! Mom

Day #27

I am at GA retreat again this weekend and loving every minute. I wish I had something profound to say but I can't think of anything, so I'll tell you about my Thursday night.

I had a date! We went to see the new Alex Cross movie (Matthew Fox plays a great creeper) and then on to Panera for dinner and conversation. 

It was much needed and delightful. I so enjoy time with my fellow. 

Day #26 Becoming More than a Good Bible Study Girl

I am in the second week of a Bible study called Becoming More than a Good Bible Study Girl, by Lysa Terkeurst.  Joy gave me the book a few years ago and I read it as a fast read, not slowly reading and digesting it.  But in reading it again now, and doing the workbook, I am going it through it more slowly and processing it as I go.  Man, it is some good stuff.  It's basically taking a look at my life, and all the "good/right" things I do (going to church, serving others, reading my Bible, etc) and checking those off of the Good Bible Study Girl checklist.  Then, asking the questions "What about my heart?  Are these things just external, so that I am looking good to others?" etc.

From page 34, "When God's Word gets inside of us, it becomes the new way we process life.  It rearranges our thoughts, our motives, our needs and our desires."

One Scripture that has changed my life is a verse from 2 Timothy.  I was introduced to this Scripture the summer of 1987 when I worked at the Vineyard (with Chanda Clark, Buffy Coble and Ron Thompson).  This was our theme for summer.  This verse changed my life.  Not necessarily that summer, but more so in years to come. 

2 Timothy 1:7  "For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of love, power and sound mind."

What this says to me: Fear does not come from God. It comes from the enemy.  When I am fearful, the enemy is thrilled.  He has got me right where he wants me:distracted.  When I am fearful, the enemy loves it: I'm questioning God, His love for me, His plan for me, His promises.  Fear is not from My Father who loves me more than I can even understand.  Here are the things that do come from Him - a spirit of love: love that comes from Him and flows out of me onto other people, a love that I do not even pretend to understand, just accept it and enjoy it.  He gives me power - power that comes from Him, power of self-control, bringing my runaway thoughts back under control, power that fights thoughts of jealousy and pride.  He also gives me sound mind = clear thinking, rational thinking.

Those are things that He provides, but I have to choose whether or not to accept those.  I wish I could say "Oh, yes! Everyday, those are the choices I make." But that would be a big fat lie, because I don't.

I agree with the quote above from Lysa's book, about God's Word inside us rearranging our thoughts, motives, needs and desires.  The hurdle for me is allowing it in.  After years of attending church and listening to hundreds of sermons, and even years of personal Bible study, I have the head knowledge. When I allow the Word to get all the way into my heart, things do change, no doubt about it.  But that is the hard part.

I heard a college student say not too long ago (when talking about a class that teaches application of God's Word) something along the lines of, "If we learn and learn about Scripture but never apply it to our lives, all that makes us is smarter sinners."

 Just some food for thought.

Day #25

Life is hard.

Yesterday, a family in our church was changed and things won't ever be the same. I cannot put into words all that I think or feel but Amanda has done it so beautifully, I'm linking over to her post.  You can read it here.

Day #24 School

School - public vs university model?

Our family has been a part of both of these types of schools.  In fact, we've had one girl in each for the past 4 years.  Katie was at Lighthouse, a university model school, for 6th - 8th grades (85ish students).  She went to class M W and; F and we did school at home on T and Th.  It was a great experience.  As was the public school she attended the previous years.  Those teachers at Lawson had it going on! We loved our time there.

This year, Katie is at Central High School, public school, with 1,500ish students.  Needless to say, big change this year.  I'm going to ask if I can interview her and if she agrees, her thoughts will be appearing here very soon.

Today, Mary Margaret has agreed to be interviewed. Background on her: K and 1st grade at Lawson, 2nd grade at South, 3rd and; 4th grades at Moreau Heights (all public).  We never had a horrific anything at these schools.  Her teachers cared for her and taught her and loved on her while she was at each one.  Leaving Moreau Heights was the toughest, I believe because she's older and has established relationships and that makes all the difference when leaving a place.

She and Katie have switched places, so to speak.  She goes to Glora Deo Academy here in Springfield, a classical education university model school.  She goes to class M and; W, and we are home T, Th and; Fri.  Most weeks she finishes her schoolwork on Thurs and has Friday "off."

Me: What are some things like you like about your school?
MM: New Friends! I only have to go to actual class two days a week, and we are home the other days.  People in my class are nice to each other.  And with a smaller group (15), the girls get closer with all the girls and the guys are closer to each other, we all can get to know each other better.  I love how at recess we get to be with kids in other grades, like the 4th and 6th grade girls.  We have a field to play in. I get to take Latin.  We are having a dinner theater! We talk about God in our class and we read the Bible at school.

Me: What is your least favorite thing?
MM: Wearing a uniform.  But it's not too bad. It is comfy and I get to choose what color shirt I wear.

Me: If you could change anything about your new school, what would it be?
MM: No uniform.

She did tell me that while EER (gifted in Jefferson City) was challenging in one area at a time (of her choosing), this is challenging in every area every day.

I will say that she is certainly being stretched like never before, and I've had to be patient as that in itself is an adjustment, not to mention everything else around her changing (with moving to a new city).

It seems that she is feeling more settled now, more sure of herself.  I have struggled over the years with feeling like MM sometimes gets the short end of the stick (due to circumstances beyond my control - us moving, others moving, etc).  I believe she will thrive and flourish in the next few years.  She has such an amazing compassion for people. It's going to be exciting to see how God uses that in her life and in the lives of those around her.

Day #23

32 days until our vacation.

I think I am looking forward to this trip more than anyone else in my family.  I keep thinking about the fact that these family trips, with just the 4 of us, are now numbered.  3 years from now, Katie will be off to college, and will be working, etc.  I see friends whose kids are grown and off on their own, or in college, and the number of times they are all together goes down significantly.  Now those kids are bringing home their significant others, or all the kids are rarely home at the same time -- I now it's the natural progression of things, it just makes me want to treasure these times - the time we are all together, the original Hughes Four. 

And so, in 32 days, we will head to DisneyWorld. 

Oh, wait, did I say vacation? Maybe I should call it our family trip.

Day #22 In a funk

Today is one of those days. I am in a funk.  I'm certain that lack of rest over the weekend contributes to this greatly.  Be that as it may, I'm still in a funk. I'm teary. I'm grumpy. I want to go back to bed.

I blew it this weekend.  Not externally.  You could have been in the same room with me all weekend and never known that I blew it. Because even though it was not evident on the outside, it was in my heart. Only two of us knew - God and me.

I was angry.  I still am.  I know what to do with my mad (take it to God, give it to Him and leave it).  I know how to do this. IT IS HARD TO DO.  I know why to do this.  His word tells me to, it's one of the ways He shows His love for me, by bearing my burdens.

I go through the thoughts in my mind, this is righteous indignation, I have a right to be angry about this. 

But really, do I? Didn't I give up my "rights" when I gave my life to Jesus? He calls me to complete surrender.

This battle between flesh and Spirit continues. It is day by day, sometimes hour by hour, even minute by minute.

I've asked God to forgive me for my anger, and I know that He has.  Now, it is time to move forward and leave this in the rear view mirror.

Sweet surrender.  That seems like an oxymoron.  But what rest it brings. Rest for my heart.  Peace that I cannot find anywhere else.

Lamentations 3:22-23

²² Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed,
for his compassions never fail. 

²³ They are new every morning;
great is your faithfulness.

 

 

 

 

Day #21

Negative people suck the life right out of me.